I'm ready what about you?

Alhamdulillah yesterday was the day where I felt like a new born. I made confessions with myself and I'm pretty good in that I think. hahah While talking and confronting my own self, I found out that there are thousands of changes that I need and may need. So i did a great reflection ALONE. It works peeps. You guys should try once.

Now, I put less hopes and expectation instead I'm creating new memories. I kinda like my new self. I had this thought that made me think day and night and it seems a good and noble idea. I used to be the one that tries to make people around me happy and work hard to get some attentions but actually the harder I tried the worse I became. But yesterday made me think, that wasn't what I want. I don't need any attentions I don't need to be known or cared or even talked about that is not me. I'm here in this world to work my very best to do all the good things that I can.

I'm ready for changes. Yeah, really sure and this morning I woke up, I smiled and I felt relief. It was really GREAT. Thanks Almighty. Now, I just have to put my feet together and start to walk on my new chapter in life. This is my sacrifice and I did it. Hope those who are like me will find their true paths. Life is not about getting others to think about you or be friend with thousands of people. These are just bonuses but the ultimate mission is find who you are because for there you'll know who is Allah the most Powerful and the Almighty.

So long peeps.. Enjoy your weekend!

Pain or Die? You choose

When I first step in UTP, I learn something that I've never heard or practiced before. PANADOL! yeah paracetamol in other word is like some of my friends' besties. Peeps those are not your friends, they are you freinemy (friend+enemy). Too many pain killer can kill your body. I'm telling you this because I just had a bad news about a friend of mine who is now suffering in the hospital as one of her lung is out! Now, the doctor is doing some scanning on the other lung in case it is not functioning, then she's dying.

My parents taught me not to take any panadol whenever I have fever or period-pain or headache etc. Those are suppose to be prescriptive medicine. You need to control that or just stop taking one! please I'm begging to all. This is the 2nd time I heard this disease among UTP students. Yes they help you to relief the pain but at the same time they eat your body. Pain is not that bad as to compare to death. Please, pain is just a temporary sickness but death, you'll be making you parents cry and mourn you. I know we can't avoid death but we can try our best to avoid spoiling and damaging our bodies.

SAY NO TO PANADOL! please please please.

the finale

it's finger-counting to the moment where I can call myself the most great senior in UTP (bachelor please). Well not really happy to be the eldest cause people will starts calling me Kakak, heheh as if they didn't before. Whatever. So tomorrow will be the date where I can happily study in UTP cause knowing that I'm leaving it soon in 5 months time. InsyAllah, praying for the best.

As usual I have no awkward or exotic kind of celebrating my last day before new semester starts. So I particularly have no plans in my mind cause all I want to do is enjoying my day unpacking my stuffs and get ready for tomorrow. Wow it sounds scary huh. Yeah but actually I already felt the heat since the past 2 weeks. Boiling my butt in the lab for 6 hours doing my experiments eh telling you this, doing cementing tests are yucks! I don't think that I can do it anymore. I actually sprained my shoulder and arm just to break the cement out from the testing cell. Man that was really hard with this woman-ly power, I can't do it all by myself. I've surrendered yesterday from repeating the tests that is surely won't works. It's just a waste of time.

Ah-ha talking about equipment, you know I hate cementing test equipments! those machines are really dumb (I should call) and they're too sensitive. I just don't know how API standard approved those designs I wish I could re-design and improve those machines and turn those into something better and more practical. haha sorry I'm getting a bit emotional in the lab whenever my tests failed.

ok2, I should continue the unfinished job, removing my things to my actual room. hahah it's just next door anyway. Till next post. So long :)

Karma

How does it feels knowing someone who is really forcing and annoying? Oh man I think I am one. How to get rid of it? I tried several times to not to think about my problems but I can stop pushing myself from letting the truth-spoken. Ya Allah I know that wasn't a good move and I should never ever give a try yesterday. But you know the truth spoke I guess.

How do you actually say to someone that you hate him/her? or how would you arrange your words in letting someone aware that you admire him/her? Don't get me wrong. Hate and Admire can be in thousands meanings! I can feel it right in my bones that I was suppose to wait cause wasn't the good time to spit it anyway.

Well I had this experience avoiding someone yeah because I gets annoyed with him/her. So why the hell I'm trying to be the annoying one? What was in my head? oh this song is really imitating me Thanks for the memories by Fall Out Boy. Yeeehaaaa... 'And I want these words to make things right, but it's the wrongs that make the words come to life' as if this lappy knows my problem. hehe..

Tears? not till that but heart-broken. I'm still a rookie trying to take my hands off from the cookie jar. That's the beauty of life I guess with none I think my life will be dark, dull, too mellow, boring. Ok people let me mourn the gone of the memories. Should I think about it? urgh... I hate these devilish thoughts. ok2 bye friends. So long :) *typing in rush* 

Bukan Disini - SOFAZ

*verse 1
tiba masa untuk ku pergi
melangkah pergi dari sini
tak terlintas di hati ini
untuk menyakiti hatimu lagi


*verse 2
kau tetap di hati
tiada pengganti
maafkanlah kasih
tempatku bukan disini

*chorus
bisakah kau berdiri
tanpaku disisi mu lagi
bisakah kau sendiri
mengubati luka di hati

(repeat)

the DEBATE!

Haha ok since I can now legally vote during the election then I should take these free time to know A LITTLE BIT about these issues. Latest issue, the debate between the Prime Minister and Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim (DSAI). As a democratic country, I think this is a good and healthy progress in Malaysia because at least the citizen will be enlighten on what is actually happening to the country behind the scene.

Not to be on anyone side, I just think that the USA is having kinda great democracy laws and practices where everyone has the right to give their opinions. I watched once DSAI debated with one of the minister back in 2007/2008 on the fuel price. So this time I guess it's going to be a better debate and more informative way off learning and get to know my country better. Haha yeah I admit that I couldn't care less about those but it feels good to know about the political conspiracy and propaganda.

 

The PM should go for the debate. Really he's the leader and leader never says give up or surrender. He should be a good model and example in teaching the young generation how a good leader should act like. I can;t wait to glue my eyes if the debate is so to happen soon. hihi

Ok people, have a great and progressive day. Tomorrow is a public holiday here. Woooowwwweeyyyy! Bye all so long :)

Jan 18, reflection

Iffah's Night Reflection as of 18/01/2011:

Forgiving people is hard but asking for one is not!

Just please stop saying 'Lagikan Nabi Muhammad ampunkan ummat-nya inikan kita manusia biasa' or 'Forgive and forget'. Those are all bullshit! Because it is not easy to forgive others and it is totally hard to just forget it. Prophet Muhammad is perfect but not us, am I right? I learnt few things today. Every single move I made, every single thoughts I think, every single things that happened I just can't keep on lying to myself. I seek for forgiveness but I did get it, people asked for forgiveness but I hardly give it back. So that is how my world turns now.

People say 'What comes around comes all the way back around' but is that true? Maybe for some people it implies perfectly but not ALL. believe me not ALL. There are people outside there that is far way lucky that us. Unfortunately they're not us. Today I've gone through a lot. Man, I wish I can cry to myself and say 'YOU DESERVE THAT IFFAH'. Things are coming back to me now.

Today wasn't the best day in my life when I lost one of my pants and my lab test was a failure. Till at one time I shouted 'Ya Allah, what did I do wrong?'. I know I deserved those. My life is really a mess right now. Don't talk about LUCKY because I never had once. Here I just wanna share some facebook comments that I feel attracted to this;

names and pictures are censored due to privacy and sensitivity

I think that this lady is hardly forgiving her friend. Maybe it is too hurtful for her to swallow those mistakes. At a certain point, I think I can be in both position, the person seeking for apologize and the person to give apologize. Well, honestly I don't know how to response on that and we're human we make mistakes and the more mistakes you're making the better you'll learn. It is just, get the right person to learn that mistake.

There goes my reflection of the night. Till next post all. So long :)