-Bukan Untukku-

I closed my eyes and I felt the tears running through the lid. I MISS YOU. What an expression that I wish I can say to you. I ain't trying to make myself occupied with something that I know I will never gonna get into but deep down in my heart I know there's you. Who am I to kneel down and ask you because I'm nobody no one. For God sake, I really miss those sacred time we had together. I wish I am courage enough to let myself to get to you and tell you the truth. Time is passing by and the further I thought I'm gonna be the closer you're coming to me.

I tried to deny the feeling and deny the future just because I'm humiliate to see your face. Damn, if you ever gonna read this stupid post I really meant this from my heart. I can't be as straight as this. You've punishment me enough already and it's time for you to actually let go of your hatred and plant some care for me. I've been a fool, a fool for you but that is what I want to do. I forced myself to not to be desperate but God knows how desperate I am to talk to you and look into your eye balls, create a big smile so that you can open up your heart to let me in. 

This may sounded not like me but I just can't keep lying to myself that I'm freaking miss you and how I wish I could turn back the time and swallow all those moron words I said to you. Those weren't something that I want to do. Please listen up to my cry because I really mean it and I really want you to understand.